The Balance within the world is simply too wide.

I aint feeling so good right now.
I probably aint born to be loved or to hold some kind of destiny.
Looking back, I see at the repeated failures I had gone through. They probably won't be any turning points and opportunities left to come. I really want something life altering to happen in a positive way, that's why I tried so hard to initiate them. However, they all seem to fail.
Since my birth, I had been hit by something which normal kids dun really have to go through the pain and trauma. Unfortunately, it haunts me with the lines and marks left behind.
As a kid, I had been often weak, frail and sickly. Up to now despite the changes and efforts placed in, I still aint much different.
I don't even know the talents or good points I have now. I am starting to harbor hatred towards humans, for the way they think. What irony, when I myself am nothing less than a lowly mortal.
I really need a breakthrough point. I hate this stupid cycle. I hate telling myself to continously believe and make the impossible happen. I am running out of the energy and drive to continue doing so. I am not exactly a people person whom is well liked by others. Who am I kidding?
Uncle Zi ch once mentioned that some people are born to fufill great things, some simply aren't. I always have the temptation to prove him wrong. If you want something done, you don't wait for it to fall off the sky, u simply have to trigger it off. Bt now, it seems pretty much right. Perhaps the heavens work in mysterious ways to foil it.
I am feeling like an inferno now. My body feels pretty frails, stricken by a congested nose and the building up of heat. However, I sincerely hope that this shell would last for me at least till the end of monday. I really want to get past the grading and pass it.